Isn't it? Both kinds. Both kinds of Spam are funny. But all I have today is email spam. Sorry. I supply the funny, you supply the potted meats. It's just how I roll.
Anyway, I recently went "All Google, All The Time" and when I was cleaning out my yahoo inbox I found a treaure trove of subject lines:
- Hello Sir/Madam... Partnership Request - Well, they say that variety is the spice of life. Although I don't do business, funny or otherwise, with anyone who doesn't know or can't tell which I am.
- Earn Money Without Constant Effort - Do you have anything that requires no effort? Because I'm all about no effort.
- Free Tacos for America - Take that, rest of the world! (Ooooh! Conspiracy theory! I bet this one came from George Dubya, who's trying to butter us up before he leaves office so we won't talk as bad about him when he's gone.)
- Do not say it, I will get insulted - You're going to have to learn to take it if you plan to stick around here.
- It is worth investing in the size of your head - Dangit! I got a small head!
- Restructure your body optimally for sex - Um, what exactly are you planning to move and to where? Because I WILL NOT go through life with my vagine (pronounced "vah-zheen") on my forehead. I will do and say a lot of things, but that is too far.
- Your internet access is going to get suspended - Huh. This might not have been spam.
- Remember me? I have godly news for you. - I do! But honestly, I thought you were dead. I'll be damned. You're alive. Will miracles never cease?
- One new message. annex lambs - Why just the lambs? Won't they be s-a-a-a-a-d in the outbuilding without their moms? (Man, I crack me up.)