Everything I Like Causes Cancer

Where we've been convinced to write a new post on Dec. 2. Stay tuned!

9/04/2009

Mailbag

Posted by Gwen |

Well, it would seem that SOMEONE is trying to blackmail me:


The joke's on her, though, because if I'd been in a threesome (also known around this blog as a Taj Mahal because it's funny) with Eric Dane I wouldn't be ashamed of it or try to keep it quiet. Hell, I'd probably rent a billboard:


HEY EVERYBODEEEEEE!!!!! I HAD SEX WITH ERIC DANE!!!!
THERE WAS ANOTHER GIRL THERE BUT I PRETENDED SHE WAS THE MAID!
DID YOU HEAR ME? I. HAD. SEX. WITH. ERIC. FUCKING. DANE.
ME! WHICH MAKES ME BETTER THAN YOU.

I'm still going to send this blackmailer her cookies, though, because she's cute and I like her.

18 comments:

The Peach Tart said...

This is great. Sex and cookies.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Man...I need to figure out a way to blackmail more people.

The Imaginary Reviewer said...

Hell, I'm also jealous that you boffed Rebecca Gayheart!

Cowguy said...

Sounds like someone wants to get their cookies off.

SkylersDad said...

But did Eric snuggle afterwords?

Lola Lakely said...

Mmmm cookies. Mmmmm Eric Dane.

Beth Dunn said...

He is hot and so is she! xo

words...words...words... said...

Who the hell is Eric Dane?

hello haha narf said...

i would totally do em both!
so, um, color me jealous.
at least i look good in green.

Cora said...

Sex and cookies. Now we're talkin'.

Scope said...

Send the cookies with the note: "Probably only one of them is poisoned."

Whiskeymarie said...

Yeah, well, I've got some incriminating pictures of you that I KNOW you don't want anyone to see. I demand cookies and...

...oh, wait. I already put those pictures on the internets. Nevermind.

Eva Gallant said...

cookies as ransom payment?? Now that is forward thinking!

Scope said...

Gwen;

It was one year ago almost exactly (12 minutes late) that I left my first comment on your blog.

What a wild year.

Can't wait ti see what the next year brings.

Eric "Scope" Collins

Suze said...

Oh man, now that is rude. I will totally help you track down the culprit and beat her..or his...ass. Right after I'm done waiting for the mailman to bring a package.

Constructive Attitude said...

Eric Dane is HOT!

plainolebob said...

lmao, and i ain't got no idee who that feller is.

Samantha Betts said...

Too funny! If you get a chance, I have an award waiting for you at sam-in-progress.blogspot.com. Thanks for the laughs!

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