Everything I Like Causes Cancer

Where we've been convinced to write a new post on Dec. 2. Stay tuned!

For the most part I don’t discuss politics.  I’ll talk your ear off about those shoes you’re wearing and the weather, even religion, but politics . . . meh . . . just not my forte.  I understand the issues and I know what choices are best for me, but I rarely feel comfortable discussing them.  It’s just too personal. (Ok, mostly it’s that if we disagree I’ll get mad and act a fool and then we'll both be uncomfortable and nobody needs that kind of unecessary stress.)

Anyway, a week from today we’ll* be voting in what’s being marketed as “the election of our lifetimes.”  I’m not sure it’s all that, we’ve got some shaky years ahead of us with real potential for tougher decisions, but this election is an important one.

Look, I don’t give two shits who you’re voting for, I just care that you do it.  It’s important.  Do it.  Don’t forget.  Don’t get lazy.  Don’t waste your chance to make a choice.

Speaking of making good choices, it’s always a good idea to "don a glove when practicing the love" and these 2008 Election condoms from condomania.com are perfect for making your voice heard in ways other than inarticulate grunting.

There's the McCain:

Cute, but I'm not sure I'd trust its efficacy.

And the Obama:


If you use good judgment you'll smile all the live-long day!

But my absolute favorite is the Palin:

“Not thrilled at the idea of evangelical social conservative Sarah Palin in the White House? 
Worried about the implications on comprehensive sexual education, abstinence-only programs, 
abortion rights and gay rights? If so, then Palin Protection Condoms are for you!"

I even came up with one of my own:

The Condy-dom - 100% effective because
you can't keep an erection, let alone impregnate someone.

*  This offer not valid in Canada. Sorry, poo and kat! You guys had your turn a couple weeks ago.

19 comments:

Jon said...

What the...? Is American Idol back already??

words words words said...

I love that you correctly used and spelled the word "efficacy". Yeah, these are the things I dig, because I'm a dork.

Dr Zibbs said...

Gwen thanks for the link to the innovative condoms. Seriously, what's with the weird shapes? Were they made for John Merrick?

Scope said...

Voting? Been there. Done that. As they say up here in Chicago, "Vote early, vote often*."

* Often only applies to the dead and non-US citizens, so Poo and Kat, come on down to the Windy City.

The Imaginary Reviewer said...

I'm more in need of a Joe Biden condom. They go on and on and on and on and on and on...

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

What? No Biden condom? No wonder he's so cranky all the time.

surviving myself said...

This is why bloggers exist - to do awesome things like this.

McGone said...

Ironically, the guys who would buy the Palin condom really just need to use the picture on the packaging, as opposed to the condom inside.

-R- said...

I already voted too. Yay, absentee ballots!

This election is important to me, but I really don't get why the news people keep saying it's the biggest election of my lifetime. In retrospect, it seems like the 2000 election was the biggest of my lifetime (so far).

LYDIA said...

haha - The condy-dom was by far the best.

pistols at dawn said...

I'm going to buy the Palin condom, but only use it for hardcore gay sex.

Mo said...

Heheh--I totally forgot whatever witty comment I had planned after reading McGone's. Ain't that the truth.

Fancy Schmancy said...

Love the Condy-dom. You are one clever lady!

Moe Wanchuk said...

Oh Gwen.....just to let you know, us Lovers of Mono-erotic Love, don't need condoms!

Renaissance Woman said...

Already voted, love early voting! And I vote for the condy-dom.

enc said...

I already voted, and it felt good.

hello haha narf said...

love the political condoms...now why didn't i think of that?
don't answer that.

MelO said...

LMAO!!! Bwaaaa ha ha ha ha ha! The Condy-dom is my favorite. No, Palin Protection... No, Condy!

LOL. Nice work.

Evil Genius said...

I understand the issues and I know what choices are best for me, but I rarely feel comfortable discussing them. It’s just too personal. (Ok, mostly it’s that if we disagree I’ll get mad and act a fool and then we'll both be uncomfortable and nobody needs that kind of unecessary stress.)

My sentiments - EXACTLY!

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