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Taste of Soulard: The Lowlights

Posted by Gwen |

1. Ditching Scope.

As you may or may not have read over at his place we lost Scope for about an hour at the end of the day on Saturday.  It was entirely unintentional.  I swear.  Our group was made up of several smaller groups and numbered 20 or more.  It was difficult keeping track of everyone as the smaller groups kept taking off in different directions to other bars.  Mid-afternoon a decision was made to move again and the groups, for once, were all in the same bar and ready to leave at the same time so evacuation happened fast.  So fast, in fact, that when Scope came out of the porta john the only people in the crowd that he knew had simply disappeared.  Gone.  Vanished.

When we got to the next bar I started asking where he was.  Everyone had scattered to the four corners of the bar so it was easy to believe that everyone had seen him someplace else.  We were finally forming a real search party when we got the call from Laughlin's 15 year old son telling us that Scope had called him for help.

Hey guys! I found Scope! He's on this phone!

As Johnny B commented on Sunday, "We didn't ditch him.  We were thinking about him.  We just forgot to continue thinking about him."

2. Learning how to make Nicolay's famous Homecoming Bloody Mary's.  This is a skill I should put on my resume and will be a regular feature of my Sunday morning ritual from here to eternity.

3. Scratch 'N Sprinkle:  I don't remember what this is but I know it has something to do with scratching your crotch and sprinkling the imaginary dandruff or fumunda or whatever onto someone's food.  H?  Clarification?

Whatever it is, this is apparently what Scratch 'N Sprinkle looks like.

3. Jeannie's new motto:  If you can't say something nice, be vague.

4. The only acceptable thing to have in a stroller at Mardi Gras is a keg.  Otherwise you might forget the stroller.

5. Sunday morning breakfast:  Steve whipped up omelettes and hash browns and biscuits . . . he even made a Slinger for Biloz though he was skeptical of the ingredients:

We were all skeptical about the future of scary bathroom (which I cleaned, by myself and without gloves*, so there) after he ate it.

6. This sign.

BTW, the left-handed bird is for those of you who noticed I always use my right if flying solo.  I need to practice my sneer - it's not as angry as it used to be.

7. Seeing LARPers in Carondelet Park on Sunday.  No lie.  There was a group of about 20 guys dressed in wacky renaissance and alien costumes doing battle with Nerf swords.  I was mostly embarrassed that I knew who they were and what they were doing.

*  Alright, alright.  I didn't have gloves but I did cover my hands with a clean cat pan liner.


Dr Zibbs said...

Surrrrrrre you didn't ditch him. But then again, if someone takes a dump in a porta-john I guess that's what they get.

My question for Scope is - where was your cell phone man?

Dr Zibbs said...

And also, HI to my friend H in that picture. "Hi H"!

Giggle Pixie said...

If you can't say something nice, be vague.

That totally made my day. :-)

Stacie said...

you always have so much fun...and I love reading about it!

SouthernBelle said...

"If you can't say something nice, be vague."

Ohh, I'm so stealing that!

Sass said...

Oooh....so a certain Sunday in March a certain blogger BFF will be getting aforementioned bloody mary???

Yay me!

mo.stoneskin said...

I couldn't think of anything nice so...when you say Steve whipped up an omelette, yet showed him with his head pretty much in the omelette, what did you mean?

Cora said...

Poor Scope, ditched while going potty. (snicker) See, this is why girls go to the bathroom in groups, fellas. The buddy system never fails. No woman would ever be ditched while in the bathroom because we would have all our friends right there with us!!

Oh, and Zibbs, cut him some slack - when you gotta go, you gotta go!

Cowguy said...

How fast did everyone run when Scope went into the portable command module?

pistols at dawn said...

Usually, when someone disappears from a group, it's because the killing's started and he was a slow walker.

Scope said...

Gwen, I'll clean up my mess here:

1 - I'm pretty sure it was accidental, but that shifty cougar in zebra clothes might have been behind it.

2 - No dump. The line was a few people deep. I'd rather take a crap in the alley (dumpster!) and whipe my ass on a rat than do that in a port-a-let. Gals, don't know how you can do it.

3 - My cell was with me. Not having anybody else's cell number programmed in somewhat limited it's usefulness. Except for drunk dialing "Little Laugh". Which I think does add value to the story.

words words words said...

You people do know how to have fun!

And whatever Scratch N' Sprinkle is, it's gotta be at LEAST as devious as what you thought, judging my that maniacal look on H's face.

Sassy Britches said...

Scratch and Sprinkle: I think I just threw up in my mouth a little!

Scope said...

Let the good times roll indeed.


Bella@That damn expat said...

That left-handed bird picture is a gem, Gwen!

Little Brr said...

H ~ "Scratch, Sniff 'N Sprinkle! I just grossed myself out."
This phrase was so rightly coined by Miss H after someone found a "hair" (that's definitely NOT facial) in her drink. Good times man, GOOD times!

Scope said...

Gwen - Wrote you up a little today.

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

I'm impressed that you knew what LARPers were.

I'm more impressed that you didn't ridicule them to death.

I'm seriously impressed that you're ambidextrous when it comes to flying the bird.

Kudos, Guenosdias! Kudos, indeed.

mike said...

Isn't Scope like 6'9" and 295lbs? How do you lose someone that big?

Also, I love Bloody Mary's... you should post that receipe.

Fancy Schmancy said...

I think your sneer is adorable, though adorable is probably not the look you were going for.

For some reason, I'm a lefty bird flier, don't know why, maybe I'm usually grabbing my crotch with my right hand?