Everything I Like Causes Cancer

Where we've been convinced to write a new post on Dec. 2. Stay tuned!

As I lay in bed this morning thinking about my favorite accessories . . .

The new cowboy boots . . .

The necklace made of nails . . .


The headband made of fabric from the artist’s grandma’s dress . . .

And the beaver belt . . .

. . . I realized that I still had not made good on my promise to take funny pictures of me wearing my beaver belt to submit to the real-life Beevers who created it.

My initial plan was to go to the zoo wearing my belt and stage some dumbass picture of me in my belt with real beavers. I wore that belt to the zoo like three times this summer and never once saw a beaver.

So I lay there, wondering how I could right this wrong, when suddenly it came to me that I could WRITE this wrong and crafted this poem as a way of letting
katrocket and The Beevers know that I have not forgotten my promise:

There once was a gal from Toronto
Who liked to do things on the pronto.
She gave me a belt.
My heart, it did melt.
But now I can’t find a damn beaver.

15 comments:

Dr Zibbs said...

The old beaver belt.

Cora said...

*sniff* That was simply beautiful, Gwen.

Happy Halloween!

Grant Miller said...

The search for beaver is never-ending.

SkylersDad said...

Your search for a beaver sounds quite a lot like my old dating days.

Soda and Candy said...

There's just not enough beaver-related poetry on the internet these days.

Well done miss lady!

PS I love all your accessories, you are one stylish blogger!

Imnotbenny said...

I'm pretty sure you stole that poem from Keats.

That's what I'm pretty sure of.

Eva Gallant said...

Beaver hunt! hmm...

Whiskeymarie said...

God- you'll think of ANY reason to drag your beaver out onto the internets, won't you?
Whore.

Mr. Condescending said...

The boots are awesome!

More beaver poems please!

words...words...words... said...

Huh huh. You said "beaver". A lot.

That is one of the best pictures of you ever. It's great :)

mike said...

I don't think beaver rhymes with Toronto but I like the boots...

katrocket said...

You are soooo totally the wind beneath our wings. Love you long time!

trixie + beever said...

We get a lot of beaver stuff, but don't think we've ever been given a beaver poem before! Thanks & keep on rockin' in the beav world.

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

um, that beaver belt is totally awesome.

~E said...

Did anyone else have nasty, naughty thoughts when they read "beaver belt"?

No?

Just me?

Ok, then.

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