Everything I Like Causes Cancer

Where we've been convinced to write a new post on Dec. 2. Stay tuned!

7/05/2009

Sunday Matinee: Free-stylin'

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,

A friend recently gave me one of those "free song" iTunes cards that Starbucks gives out with coffee on Tuesdays. The cards are programmed with one particular song, as opposed to getting a choice, but I love trying new things. Heck, 95% of the time I like their Free Single of the Week and not just because it's free.


Like Miss Madeleine Peyroux. Her song, Instead, was the free download on the card and as soon as I heard it, a wonderfully uplifting jazzy-bluesy piece, I was hooked and scrambling for more. In this one, Dance Me To The End Of Love, her voice is as smooth and warm as a hot toddy while the stand-up bass and piano keep your toes tapping:


Finding Madeleine, however, led me to the discovery of the day: Melody Gardot. Instant love, people. Her sound fills a void in my soul that I didn't know I had and her backstory is captivating. My out-of-the-gate favorite, Goodnite, makes me want to sit in the dark, wearing black pencil pants and smoking cigarettes:


Check out how groovy and cute she is in this one, Who Will Comfort Me. Now that I have a bunch of new jazzy musics I want to throw a cocktail party with highballs and fancy cheese and olives. Guess that one free song wasn't as free as I had expected.

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6/21/2009

Sunday Matinee: Father's Day

Posted by Gwen | Labels: , ,


Two things about this wonderfully cheesy and well-worn old song:

1. Today it's for all the Dads out there, doing their dad thing and being responsible and taking care of their families the best way they know how. You're very important dudes and we all appreciate you.

2. Every time my college BFF and I would go to our favorite dive bar we'd play this on the jukebox and sing along, loud and off-key. Drove everyone around us crazy. And everytine it would get to the part where he sings about the car keys one of us would hand our car keys to the other. Every time. We still do it when we see each other and laugh like madmen.

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2/25/2009

S is for "Stop telling ferret stories, ya maroon."

Posted by Gwen | Labels: , , ,

Wow.  You guys really don't go in for ferret stories, do ya?  My last post has now been up for over 12 hours and only received 11 comments and I lost two followers today.  While I think you're all washed up with regard to your stance on ferrets, I have noted your lack of interest and will refrain from telling any more in the future.  As if I even had another one up my sleeve.  Shuh.

Anyway, a while back I asked Stacie of Stacie's Madness to assign me a letter of the alphabet for a meme.  Like, so long ago the meme is now passe, yesterday, last week, and a rule change was in order.  Hold onto your hats, monkeys, these new rules are revolutionary.  They are insane.  They are going to set the Internet on its ear.  You've never seen anything like this before in the history of ever.  It's crazy talk, but here goes: 

Instead of posting a list of seven things I like that start with S . . . I'm posting a list of songs I like that start with S.

(I was just kidding with all that build-up stuff, BTW.)

I was surprised to find there are 233 songs in my library that start with S, and there are A LOT of them I like, but I tried to pick the ones that stood out, the ones I could hear without them playing.

There are the songs that make me move, from the first note:

Shut Up and Let Me Go, The Ting Tings  (recommended by My Pal Zibbs of That Blue Yak)
Santeria, Sublime
Sabotage, The Beastie Boys
Secret Squirrel, Marcy Playground (lead singer = cutie patootie)
Say What!, Stevie Ray Vaughn (this video has great footage of his hands at work)
Smile, Lily Allen
Space Lord, Monster Magnet
Soweto '76-'06, Joy Denalane (couldn't find a video but this audio clip thingie is pretty damn cool)


And the songs that move me, from the first note:

Send In The Clowns, Barbara Streisand  (Shut it, I luh-huh-huv this song.)
Somebody, Depeche Mode
Soul Kitchen, The Doors
Suddenly I See, KT Tunstall
Stone Free, Jimi Hendrix

And songs that  you never want to hear played in my car because I WILL sing along, loud and off-key:

Sanctify Yourself, Simple Minds
Single, Natasha Beddingfield (GIRL POWER!)
Steady As She Goes, The Raconteurs
Space Age Love Song, A Flock of Seagulls
Soul Food, Leela James (I dare you not to move your ass to this one.  Triple dog dare.)
She's Not There, The Zombies

What's your favorite song that starts with "S"?  Why do you love it so much?

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1/01/2009

It's a new dawn, it's a new day.

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,


Good morning, monkeys!  How's your head feel?  I feel surprsingly good.  In fact, I woke up with this song running on a loop in my brain and was driven to get up and share it with you because it made me feel alive and hopeful.  Happy New Year!

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12/31/2008

Happy anniversaries to me and New Year's to you.

Posted by Gwen | Labels: , ,

Fifteen years ago today, December 31, 1994, I moved to St. Louis with my college boyfriend.  I had never lived in a metropolitan area before; the biggest town I had ever lived in had a population of 20,000.  This was a huge, emotional, pivotal move for me.


Five years ago today, December 31, 2004, I moved into this house, my very first property.  Also huge, emotional, and pivotal.

Isn't that weird?  That two such red-letter days in my life both involved relocation and happened on the exact day just years apart?  Eh.  Maybe it just means I get restless about the same time every year.

Today is also day seven of my 11-day vacation.  I had hit an excellent stride with the lounging and movie watching and general sloth on Sunday but late Monday I had to get off the couch and clean myself up for The Pale Divine Reunion Show, a major event for the local music scene.  Pale Divine was a local band in the 80's who maybe should have made it big but eventually broke up.  The guitarist, Richard Fortus, went on to play with the Psychedelic Furs and currently plays with Guns-N-Roses.
Having only lived here 15 years, I never saw Pale Divine live but over the years have become a close friend of the lead singer, Michael Schaerer.  At one point he was supplementing his music income as a real estate agent and helped a boyfriend of mine buy his first house.  The show was an incredible experience for me - especially since I knew how excited Michael was to be back on stage like that and the house sold out.

And then yesterday, slightly hung over from too much fun Monday night, I had a bloody mary at lunch with the gals.  Peabody and I spent the latter half of the afternoon walking at the Zoo.  The temperate day - 62 gorgeous, sunny degrees - was perfect for seeing all the animals.  Except for the giraffes, to Peabody's dismay.



When this guy opened his eyes we saw evil and ran away.

This guy popped up out of the water unexpectedly, RIGHT THERE, less than 20 feet away.
I got so excited I stuttered.

Just so you know, we renamed hippos "aquatic running pigs" because that's what they are.  It was a good day that I topped off with an expensive steak at home with broccoli and carrots and a baked potato.  So far, necessary detoxing aside, this has been a stellar week.  And I still have four days.

Happy New Year to you, monkeys!
May you be buzzed and have another tongue in your mouth at midnight.

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12/05/2008

Ima get funkified tonight!

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,

LM and I are headed out to have a handful or 12 adult beverages and see us some Sharon Jones and The Dap Kings.  Listen to this and then TRY to tell me I won't be dancing my fanny off tonight.



I bet you are, too, right now.  Look at you booggie-ing in your chair!  You go, fancy dancer!  Have a great Friday night, you poo-flinging funk monkeys!

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11/09/2008

Come with me to the Church of Cowboy Mouth

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,

Have you ever been to a concert that was so phenomenally excellent that you couldn't bear for it to end?  That made you feel so good about yourself and being alive that you were inspired and invincible for days afterward?  No?

Then you need to go see Cowboy Mouth.  

(What's the name of the band?  The name of the band is COWBOY MOUTH!  The name of the band is . . . . COWBOY MOUTH!  This will make more sense later in this post, assuming you follow direction.)

Cowboy Mouth is a small troupe of amazing musicians out of New Orleans, Louisiana that knows a thing or two about rocking yer fucking face off.  The music is excellent but the show?  The show is . . . well . . . here, see for yourself:


Did you watch the whole video?  Go back, dummy!  You missed the best part - the part at the end where it turns into a rock and roll orgasm.  It's okay, I don't watch all the videos you put up either, but you should trust me on this one and do as I say.  The rest of this post will still be here when you're done.  Besides, it's Sunday, what the hell else do you have to do?

Done?  Okay, now watch this one where you see Fred - the front man, the drummer, the contagious, driving force behind the band and the show - not caring about fashion, not even caring about shoes and playing in his bare feet.  All Fred cares about is drumming his sweaty ass off to make you dance like your life depended on it and scream!


As a member of the audience you are subject to Fred yelling at you for not dancing hard enough or screaming loud enough.  He's been known to climb around on the infrastructure of the venue.  He will even stop the show mid-song if he feels it's necessary.  In this one he handles a security issue with humor and public ridicule through audience participation.


Speaking of audience participation watch this one where the audience throws red spoons at the band (about 0:40) when they sing the line, "she eats her red cake with her favorite red spoon" during the song Everybody Loves Jill.  I always change the words to "everybody loves Gwen" and encourage you to do the same.


If I haven't sung their praises enough here to convert you, check out their tour dates and go see them for yourselves.  Be sure to take a change of dry clothes, your most fun friends, and be prepared to rock out with your cock out.

This post brought to you by Gchat:  Bringing Fally and Gwennie together in the wee hours of the weekends since October 12.

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9/29/2008

Bellbottoms and Unicorns

Posted by Gwen | Labels: , ,

THERE ARE UPDATES AT THE BOTTOM.

In 1978 my mom remarried and the three of us moved to this house in the country. I was in 4th grade and used to living in a neighborhood with a park where all my friends and I grew up playing together. I was a frustrated and lonely kid in this house.

When I was back in my hometown last year I drove out here just to see it again. I couldn't get a picture of the front for the huge trees in the yard, which is fine since my room was on this side of the house anyway, on the second floor. The house looks much better these days than it did back then, whoever has it is taking care of it.

See that long, enclosed area on the back of the house? With the four windows? When I lived here that was a wrap-around, screened-in porch. The porch had two interior doors - one on the side and one in the back - that entered into the kitchen. I suspect they enclosed that area and extended the downstairs rooms. Makes me a little sad because that porch was awesome: it was huge and open and had a swing and a big table and looked out over the pond in the back.

I spent a lot of time in my bedroom. I wasn't an outdoorsy kid in the first place and there weren't other kids around to draw me out of the house. One of my favorite things to do was to pull a chair up to the chest of drawers in my room and stand on the chair as close to the radio as I could get and sing along to some silly radio station out of St. Louis. I don't remember the call letters or the dial number, but I remember they played 70's love songs and radio hits. I guess back then they were just called "songs" but 70's love songs and radio hits is what they're called now.

In a fashion similar to the bizarro clown-fest that went down over at Zibbs' this weekend, I've been hung up on these songs for weeks now. With the $20 or so I spent over at iTunes last night I think I've finally collected enough of these songs that my thirst is quenched.

UPDATE, 7:38 PM:

Just when I thought this little phase had run it's course Moe got me all wound up again by suggesting Fooled Around and Fell In Love by Elvin Bishop.  I totally remember how I would dance and act all serious and heartbroken when this one came on the radio.  Huge dork.

So you know I had to go get it . . . and it lead to even more . . . 
  • Peter Frampton - Baby I Love Your Way (everyday)
  • Styx - Babe
  • The Commodores - Easy (That's why I'm easy, easy like Sunday mornin')
  • Minnie Riperton – Lovin’ You (is easy 'cuz you're beautiful)
  • Peaches and Herb - Reunited (and it feels so good)
  • Andy Gibb - (Our Love) Don’t Throw It All Away
  • Andy Gibb - Shadow Dancing
  • The Bee Gees - How Deep Is Your Love



Does anyone else remember owning this and wanting to make out with it?  Someone?  Please?  Anybody?




UPDATE 10:56 PM:

I was thinking about shutting down for the night, went over to read Zibbs' new post before I called it quits, and while there I read that the song Magic my by Pilot used to make him homesick as a kid.  Great 70's song - "oh, oh, oh it's magic, you kno-o-ow, never believe it's not so" - its great clapping earned it a spot on my playlist.

UPDATE 09/30/08, 9:29 PM:

The suggestions keep rolling in and I couldn't resist these:
  • Eric Carmen - All By Myself (thanks Zibba Zabba!)
  • B.J. Thomas - Hooked on a Feeling
  • Maria Muldaur - Midnight at the Oasis
And I hang my head in shame for not thinking of this one.  It's CLASSIC. 
  • Engelbert Humperdink - After The Lovin'
Huge props to my IRL friend Eric for completing the list.  I have to end it here, before Steve Jobs owns my house.

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9/18/2008

Samplings.

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,

I'm still giggling over that last post.  I don't know what came over me but it felt good to let the mouthy whore who lives in my brain write that one.  Hee.


Anyhoo, last night I went to see a dear friend, Michael Schaerer, play at a new place in Soulard called Franco.  The food is, of course, French and delicious.  We sampled a few small plates - pommes frites, flatbread with Roquefort, olive tapanade and red pepper-tomato marmalade, and sauteed dumplings - and then Brian shared his wood grilled bistro steak, whether he wanted to or not.

Michael was, as always, fabulous.  A long time ago, in a faraway land, he was the lead singer in a band called Pale Divine.  I pulled this description from their myspace page:

THE EYES///PALE DIVINE was a local St. Louis band...Pale Divine (then known as The Eyes), quickly became hometown favorites, and had soon attracted a large following on the midwest college circuit. The quartet is fronted by Michael Schaerer, who possesses a powerful voice, charismatic stage presence, and total commitment to his music. Richard Fortus pulls an astonishing variety of sounds out of his guitars, effortlessly switching from cunningly played accompaniment to burning leads. And the rhythm section of drummer Greg Miller and bassist Dan Angenend, Jr. forms a rock-solid pocket, providing driving support for Pale Divines unforgettable songs.

I shot a video of Michael performing Witch Wife, a favorite request of mine from his solo album, Cross to Bear.  I suspect some of you have poetic souls hidden under your cynical exteriors and will recognize the lyrics as the Edna St. Vincent Millay poem of the same name.  He told me last night that he wrote the song while reading her poems and teaching himself to finger pick.  Cool, no?  

I apologize for the visual quality but isn't it about the sound anyway?


These days Michael plays with the lovely and talented Amy Miller.  When they busted out Journey's Faithfully I thought immediately of Pistols at Dawn.  I couldn't get video because there was a guy sitting in my line of vision - had I known the videos would be too dark to see, I'd have captured it for you anyway, Pistols.

In it's stead here's this, the two of them busting out The Battle of Evermore:


Word on the street is that there is a Pale Divine reunion show scheduled for December 29 at The Pageant.  Be there or miss out on screaming singing Straight to Goodbye, with the original band, as loud as you can.

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9/17/2008

Whatever.

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,



Fuck you guys, I'm going drinking.  I'm not sitting around here all night looking at your ugly mugs.  I'm going to see this guy because he's awesome.  I'm outta here.

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7/25/2008

Happy belated berfday, LM!

Posted by Gwen | Labels: , ,

I've only got a couple minutes this morning. I'm heading in to the office early and I need to get moving.

Last Saturday was LM's birthday but she had a family emergency out of town so we are celebrating tonight by going to Live on the Levee, a free summer concert series put on by the city. To be technical, this year it's Live at Soldier's Memorial because the riverfront was under water when the series started and they haven't moved it back. Tonight we're seeing Grace Potter and The Nocturnals open up for The Black Crowes, assuming it stops raining.

Here are some pictures from last year when we saw G. Love and Special Sauce:

LM and I with The Freshmaker

 Me and My Boyfriend, G. Love.
(The arch steps were covered with people by the time the concert started.)


Baby's Got Sauce

My only other real plans for the weekend are a long bike ride and seeing The Dark Knight on Sunday. I cannot wait for either event, and also some extreme couch sitting.

Have a fabulous weekend! Be safe and have fun!

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5/18/2008

Fernando Meets Tortelvis

Posted by Gwen | Labels: , , ,

I only had a couple days notice that Fernando was coming to stay with me. Thankfully I had already planned a pretty fantastic weekend so there was little preparation to do outside removing the pork from my kitchen and stocking up on adult beverages. I kept a slab of bacon in case I needed to scare him into behaving later in the week.

Fernando finished his martini on the front porch while I got ready for our evening on the town. We dropped the top on the convertible, ran a couple errands, and then headed over to LM's for pre-concert cocktails. Introductions were made and we found out Fernando was a big Kermit fan as a kid. He was giddy about getting to meet him. While we waited for James to arrive, the boys went cruisin'.


Right after we took this picture, unfortunately, there was an incident: Kermit hit the brakes a little too hard, Fernando flew off the hood of the car and got really mad, and a heated exchange followed. When I heard something about Kermit stealing all the good women, LM and I separated them. I suggested Fernando find something to do that would settle him down a little. A tall boy and the paper did the trick.

Miller products in an AB town?

McGone told me it wouldn't happen! Suh-weet!

We soon headed off for Blueberry Hill, a landmark St. Louis watering hole. It's known for it's pop culture memorabilia, creative window displays, and is along the St. Louis Walk of Fame. In fact, Chuck Berry still plays there to this day. We saw him a couple years ago for LM's birthday. He can't remember all the lyrics anymore, but it's a good show.


LM shows Fernando Chuck Berry's guitar.

We ordered a drink and headed downstairs to the Duck Room, which is the larger of the bar's two small concert venues. True to its name, the entire room is decorated with ducks - statues, posters, cartoons, you name it.

Fernando wasn't impressed with the opening band. He said they were pretenders. I agree with him. Before long the musical wonder known as Dread Zeppelin took the stage. Fernando wasn't the only one in the room who had never seen DZ; he and I were really interested to see how the band would pull off combining Led Zeppelin with reggae. Adding to the curiosity, the lead singer is an Elvis impersonator.

You heard me.

Fernando and I were discussing it yesterday and we're still not sure how they do it, but they do, and they do it well. The show is a seamless melding of reggae, Elvis, and Led Zeppelin, including at times extended riffs from The Beatles, Frank Sinatra, Kajagoogoo, and tunes from Dirty Dancing, of all things. It's also a running comedy schtick with Tortelvis telling jokes, taking questions from the crowd, and continually tormenting Charlie Haj, the guy who brings him his water and towels during the show. If you ever get the chance, go see this musical phenomenon. It was highly entertaining. At one point early in the show, one of the band members (I called him pale Satan if that tells you anything) took off his pants and never put them back on.

Fernando had a hard time seeing around the big bald heads.

The band stuck around after the show to sign stuff so we bought a CD and got it signed. Fernando and I got to meet Charlie Haj. Charlie is like Ben Carr, the dancing guy in the Mighty Mighty Bosstones - doesn't play an instrument, but adds so much to the show. Don't tell Ben, but I like Charlie better. He kissed my cheek.


Tortelvis, however, only had eyes for the pig. Go figure. Fernando told me later that he was a little scared. He did a good job of hiding it. Such a tough guy.

Fernando had heard LM and I talking about a couple friends who were down the street seeing Wilco at The Pageant and really, really, really wanted to meet up with them for more drinks, but I had to insist on going home because we were looking at a busy Saturday with an early start. He was pretty upset with me until I told him I was taking him there on Tuesday night to see The Kids In The Hall.

Stay tuned!

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5/13/2008

Not Your Typical Monday Night

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,

Most Monday nights you can find me parked on my couch watching 30 Rock and How I Met Your Mother. Last night, however, I went out with my friends and danced my ass off at an invitation-only Private Show sponsored by Jack Daniels and featuring the Latin hip-hop band Ozomatli. Described as Part Political Idealism, Part Cuban Carnival, Ozo kicks ass. Those fellas rocked my socks off last night. We didn't stop moving from the first note to the last.

Plus? There were free drink tickets.


This was my first "sponsored" concert so I was amazed when we walked in and I saw that they had replaced all the liquor on the back bar with black-label Jack Daniels. I apologize for the quality of this shot, I was so darned excited about all the Jack that I forgot how to use my camera!

The unusually quick service tipped us off that the bartenders were planted by Jack Daniels as well.

This guy was our favorite. He made delicious whiskey drinks!

LM, Mary and Zana and I sporting our Jack Schwag.

Jazz hands!


As you can see, I was a big fan of the Gentleman Jack drink stirrers.
Don't ask me why I have a highlighter in my purse. I'm a nerd.

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3/23/2008

What has happened to me?

Posted by Gwen | Labels:

Over the past few weeks I've been hearing this song on the radio that I adore, but I've never been able to catch the name of the song or the artist.

The song is kicky and upbeat. I love the artist's voice. It makes my ears happy and makes my feet tap. I heard it again on my way home from Lil BRR's Easter dinner last night. For once I was close enough to home when I heard it that I was able to remember some of the lyrics and googled it.

It's Miley Cyrus.

Off of the Hannah Montana 2 soundtrack.

I bought it anyway.

(Hangs head in shame.)

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12/29/2007

The lunatic is in my head.

Posted by Gwen | Labels: , , ,

Last night's big "Christmas Vacation 2007" adventure involved copious amounts of adult beverages, waaaay too many ciggies, and tickets to El Monster Y Los Masked Avengers, a St. Louis Pink Floyd tribute band that only comes out to play during the week of Christmas. The band members are all successful local musicians affiliated with bands like Stir, Dr. Zhivegas, and The Urge.

The lead singer, Mark Quinn, is also the lead singer for Joe Dirt and the Dirty Boys. Several years ago Cousin T and I were out seeing Joe Dirt and she pulled the rug right out from under me by reminding me that Mark was also the lead singer of the band that played one of our proms. I know that the more things change, the more they stay the same but that made me feel incredibly old and lame.

The guys have been doing this show for years and every year, for one silly reason or another, I've never been able to make it. This year they added three nights to the usual two shows and I declared early that I was going, even if I had to go by myself. Thankfully, Lil BRR and Ms. Axley threw themselves on the sword and volunteered to accompany me. I am so glad we went: those boys rocked my hiney. I just saw on the Joe Dirt website that tonight's show, the last of the five, is sold out. Bravo!


After the show we had one more for the ditch (we had a driver) at The Halo Bar and while there I morphed into The Great White Mullet Hunter.

I was humbled when the guy pictured left came over to me and introduced himself as the drummer for Head East, whose website boasts that they are The Midwest's Legendary Classic Rock Band. You can't see his face in this picture, and my memory is somewhat fuzzy, but I am as convinced as I can be that he was telling the truth. Also? He insisted it wasn't a mullet, but couldn't classify it - the nations longest (and only?) remaining tail, perhaps.

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12/11/2007

Sheesh. Why do you keep coming back here?

Posted by Gwen | Labels: ,

I mean, really . . . I just looked back over my last few posts and it seems I've had poopy drawers for a while. Three of my last four posts are tedious rants about the craptastic weather. Good Lord - who the eff cares? There's no reason for you to still be here, but I'm glad you are. Does this mean we're friends?

Yay!

::punches you in the shoulder::

Well, friend, I apologize for the darkness. As penance for posting that depressing drivel, I wrote the following List Of Four Things I Am Currently Enjoying The Crap Out Of, so you'll know I don't have any (crap) in my pants.


List Of Four Things I Am Currently Enjoying The Crap Out Of


  1. The Dead Milkmen. A recent exposure to Jackass 2 and it's soundtrack reunited me with my love of Punk Rock Music. While cruising iTunes after seeing the movie, looking for a couple songs from the soundtrack, I ran across a mention of The Dead Kennedys. Which made me remember The Dead Milkmen. The first song I ever heard of theirs was "Bitchin' Camaro" - some friend of Cousin T's gave her a mix tape with that song on it and I was immediately enthralled with their angst and humor. Plus they rock. I'm shocked that I still know the words to most of the songs on Eat Your Paisley, their sophomore effort and easily my favorite. You can't deny the draw of lyrics like, "Got a skateboard "gnarly rad" / With money from you mom and dad / Take a bath cause you smell bad / Why are you a moron?" I also picked up some Camper Van Beethoven and Josie Cotton's "Johnny Are You Queer?" Awwwww, punk, thanks for being back in my head; it's a kick.

  2. The expectation of a good drunk. I've cleared my schedule for a handful or 12 adult beverages on Friday afternoon following our work holiday luncheon. I haven't been out on the town in many weeks and it is time, time to let my hair down. If you need proof of how much fun this annual gathering is, I'll tell you that last year Lil BRR suffered a nicotine overdose. Poor thing had quit smoking six months prior to the party, but was having a really hard time with it while sitting next Chimneys 1 and 2 (Pattie and I) so Pattie pulled a nicotine patch out of her purse and slapped it on her. It isn't a big surprise that she passed out with it still on given that our bar bill was $150. No, the big surprise was how sick she was the next day. She called me at about 9 am, close to tears, trying desperately to convey how sick she was. She's since gone back to cigarettes.

  3. Flannel sheets. When I changed the beds this weekend I put the flannels on. It's like sleeping on a cloud.

  4. Chocolate and Peanut Butter Chip Cookie Dough. I whipped up a batch of chocolate and peanut butter chip cookie dough on Sunday, and much of the cookie dough is gone, but I have yet to bake anything. Raw cookie dough is the best thing in the world. I take that back - being an adult who can make her own decisions and deciding to eat raw cookie dough for breakfast is the best.

See? Happy. Although next time it seems like I'm in a funk do me a favor . . . throw some punk on the turntable and turn it up . . . feed me chocolate and alcohol until I pass out . . . or puke . . . or pass out AND puke . . . and then wrap me in flannel. I guarantee I'll wake up with my attitude adjusted.

Love you!

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